Tuesday, January 26, 2016
96 Days
I really think that no matter where I live my toilet has special powers. I really do some of my best thinking there. So last night I was thinking about how life can pass you by... By doing what you have to do to survive and that's working. Of course it depends on the type of job you have but for the average person their job doesn't pay them enough to live the exciting adventure filled life that they dreamed of. If they're lucky enough to get a job where they can afford it they usually don't have the time. I fall into both categories in the wonderful world of retail sales. Now before I say anything let me first say I'm thankful for this job because it's allowing me to bring this post to you. Whether you apply it or not is up to you.. (Definitely rambling slightly) But the retail life is terrible because your pay is never the same and you work crazy hours and the holidays make you suicidal. I don't know about anybody else but after being away from my bed and my toilet for 12 hours is stressful enough without the added stress of the 9-10 hours spent working. Once I get home I'm spent. Mentally and physically. So much of the day is spent with customers who quite frankly need you to think for them and that's not calling them dumb but we're "specialists" so we have to know everything about everything and what's best for them. I'm an introvert so I'd rather spend most of the day alone thinking about whatever so after not being able to get lost in my own thoughts the only thing I want to do after work is sit on my toilet eat then get in the bed. I also write, read etc. (can you end a sentence with etc? I'm sure Trav knows) Not to mention I was probably up around 6:30 am. I say that to say this. That was one day and I still have 4 more of those. So the 2 days I get off I have to sleep, socialize, workout, get a haircut, drive home to see everybody, work on a business, pay bills, think about paying student loans and clean up. What if I want to take a trip? What if I wanted to see the world? If you follow my snapchat you would've saw me calculating the days you have off per year and I came up with 96. Feel free to check my arithmetic. I'm not counting staycation days either. To me... 96 days isn't enough time to see the world.
Wednesday, January 6, 2016
New Year... New... Me?
"I started at the bottom, blind leading the blind... I did it by myself, so it took me some time" -Rick Ross; Rapper
It's that time of the year. The beginning of the year where everybody is gearing up for change... and others are gearing up to discourage it. One of the most discouraging ills of this beautiful country is that we have a society that prefers to criticize more than they prefer to congratulate. Discourage more than encourage. Don't get me wrong, I know some of it is jokes, but more often than not people actually are critical of those people who set goals for the new year.
Let's dissect it though. I wonder if people ever stop to think about why some people wait for the new year to try to change. Because not only is change hard... it's scary! A new year is symbolic of another chance and that's motivating. Change is a very scary thing because often times the only thing people fear more than death, is failure. It's such a scary thing to put your all into something and it not work out how you hoped. It's also hard to be consistently disciplined enough to resist what ever temptation can detour you from the goals you have set.
For example, if your goal is to get out of a toxic relationship right? You tweet it, you talk about it, you put it in the universe, you actually try to but the feelings unfortunately are still there right? people not only wait for you to go back to that relationship just to say "I told you so", they rarely will try to help you with the process of getting away. But what are friends for? Why aren't we there for each other more without judgment? Why don't we give each other more positive reinforcement?
Another example, your "new year, new me" goal is to relocate to a new city. You tweet it, you talk about it, you put it in the universe, you actually try to but the reality of life is that relocation isn't easy. If your family is where you currently live, even with money and a job lined up it's hard to detach enough to leave. But instead of giving you positive reinforcement, people will tell you and anybody else that will listen that you're not going nowhere. Those same people will wait for six months to pass with you not relocating to bring back up in your face that "you still here". Now I'm not one for excuses at all, but I know we, as a society, would rather pull you back in the water, than to help you get out.
There have been many crossroads in my life that I had to face. Decisions had to be made that shaped my relationships, my career, my family and my happiness. Some helped two of those and ruined another, helped one and ruined the other three, and otherwise. The point is at all of those crossroads the one constant was disruption. Meaning, however things were before said crossroad, they would never be the same after. Some people would have just turned around and went back into their comfort zone, I too have done so a few times, but why? Because a disruption is exactly that and a lot of times we wonder why shake the boat if everything at the time is manageable. That fear of the unknown is realer than a Mike Tyson punch in the 80's, ask Michael Spinks. It takes the perfect combination of bravery and faith to take a leap... of faith! Which is essentially what being open to change is!
So while there's "new year, new me" posts from people who are in the same position with the same habits as this time last year, people who will be in the same predicament next year, and people with brilliant and hilarious jokes about said people, don' be ashamed to at least attempt to better yourself with the genesis of yet another year you're here! Even if you don't even believe you're capable of doing the things you're professing, say it enough until you do believe it. Encourage people around you to do the same thing. Share your goals, your vision boards, and your lessons learned overtime that will help this year be better. And if December 31, 2016 comes around and not much have changed... thank God you have the chance to try again! It's a marathon, not a sprint.
My thoughts
"As long as I'm breathing, can't knock the way a nigga eating!"
It's that time of the year. The beginning of the year where everybody is gearing up for change... and others are gearing up to discourage it. One of the most discouraging ills of this beautiful country is that we have a society that prefers to criticize more than they prefer to congratulate. Discourage more than encourage. Don't get me wrong, I know some of it is jokes, but more often than not people actually are critical of those people who set goals for the new year.
Let's dissect it though. I wonder if people ever stop to think about why some people wait for the new year to try to change. Because not only is change hard... it's scary! A new year is symbolic of another chance and that's motivating. Change is a very scary thing because often times the only thing people fear more than death, is failure. It's such a scary thing to put your all into something and it not work out how you hoped. It's also hard to be consistently disciplined enough to resist what ever temptation can detour you from the goals you have set.
For example, if your goal is to get out of a toxic relationship right? You tweet it, you talk about it, you put it in the universe, you actually try to but the feelings unfortunately are still there right? people not only wait for you to go back to that relationship just to say "I told you so", they rarely will try to help you with the process of getting away. But what are friends for? Why aren't we there for each other more without judgment? Why don't we give each other more positive reinforcement?
Another example, your "new year, new me" goal is to relocate to a new city. You tweet it, you talk about it, you put it in the universe, you actually try to but the reality of life is that relocation isn't easy. If your family is where you currently live, even with money and a job lined up it's hard to detach enough to leave. But instead of giving you positive reinforcement, people will tell you and anybody else that will listen that you're not going nowhere. Those same people will wait for six months to pass with you not relocating to bring back up in your face that "you still here". Now I'm not one for excuses at all, but I know we, as a society, would rather pull you back in the water, than to help you get out.
There have been many crossroads in my life that I had to face. Decisions had to be made that shaped my relationships, my career, my family and my happiness. Some helped two of those and ruined another, helped one and ruined the other three, and otherwise. The point is at all of those crossroads the one constant was disruption. Meaning, however things were before said crossroad, they would never be the same after. Some people would have just turned around and went back into their comfort zone, I too have done so a few times, but why? Because a disruption is exactly that and a lot of times we wonder why shake the boat if everything at the time is manageable. That fear of the unknown is realer than a Mike Tyson punch in the 80's, ask Michael Spinks. It takes the perfect combination of bravery and faith to take a leap... of faith! Which is essentially what being open to change is!
So while there's "new year, new me" posts from people who are in the same position with the same habits as this time last year, people who will be in the same predicament next year, and people with brilliant and hilarious jokes about said people, don' be ashamed to at least attempt to better yourself with the genesis of yet another year you're here! Even if you don't even believe you're capable of doing the things you're professing, say it enough until you do believe it. Encourage people around you to do the same thing. Share your goals, your vision boards, and your lessons learned overtime that will help this year be better. And if December 31, 2016 comes around and not much have changed... thank God you have the chance to try again! It's a marathon, not a sprint.
My thoughts
"As long as I'm breathing, can't knock the way a nigga eating!"
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