The popular phrase "falling back" has always been tied to dating and relationships. It always seems to fit in when the person of your interest is not reciprocating your efforts the way you need them to. They could be playing games or maybe not as interested as you thought they were. But either way we decide (early on or even when its too late) that we need to fall back.
Urban dictionary gives us plenty of definitions and examples but the overall feel is to lose interest, stop caring and let someone "do them".
In another light fall back can mean for someone to chill out, relax and think about their next actions before they actually do them.
So whether you like the first definition or the second, does it apply somewhere in your life? Not just in relationships. Life nowadays seems like it can get pretty busy for me between working two jobs, trying to finish school, trying to maintain a social life and working on my dreams. Sound familiar? Even with all this I have found several ways to master the art of falling back and taking care of whats important, me.
Listed are a few tips to help you do the same; if you have any input on what you do to maintain drop them below in the comments section :)
1. Unplug from social media.
Gone are the days when we wouldnt know our friends business unless they told us, or someone else spilled the tea. But today you can log onto any social media platform and see everything from what they had for breakfast to what their kids are wearing to school that day. Social media, in my mind, becomes the land of comparing. And that can be dangerous. Your life is your own path, but that road can get hazy when you have flooding images of partying, vacation photos, weddings, and numerous other things. We get sucked into the thoughts of "I dont have those things" or "they sure are happy" but we tend to forget people don't often display the bad.
When social media becomes overwhelming, and it does, its ok to log off. Scientific studies have shown that excessive use of certain social media platforms can have a vast effect on your daily mood, sometimes even your health. Depression and mood swings have been linked to longterm use of social media. I recently wrote a research paper on it for a critical thinking class I took. Taking a day or two to not log in may actually be just what the "Doctor" prescribes for you to get you back to being YOU.
2. Find a new hobby.
Hobbies are those little things that we love to do but sometimes we get too busy "adult-ing" to actually do. Recently Ive gotten back to finding new things to do or revisiting old favorite past times of mine. Reading, writing and dancing are a few of mine. I started reading again and actually taking time out of my schedule to find new books to get lost in. Getting back into writing has been the best escape for me. Maybe you aren't into writing or reading and prefer something more active or hands on. Groupon and Living Social offer great deals to try something new. Trying something new may spark an interest in a hobby you never knew you had. Recently I tried a dance class with some friends and we had the best time.
3. Developing healthy lifestyle changes.
Eat right and exercise. Sounds simple right? Gets preached to us often, right? Between the supplements, new superfoods and the influx of Instagram models pushing waist shapers and flat tummy teas it can get to be a bit much. For me at least. But recently I got with one of the best trainers in Atlanta, IamtherealDP and its had a positive impact on my life. Ive adopted a better way to eat and dine out. Ive also joined his group fitness sessions. My early mornings that include the gym help me have a better mood and a jumpstart on my day. Im not preaching fitness but swapping out candy for fruit, or even joining a social dance/workout class can help you to burn a few calories and even help improve your mood. Increasing your heart rate increases blood flow which in exchange helps your body function better. Simple changes can have you looking better. And when you look better you feel better.
4. Removing the toxic people/things from you life.
Mary said it best when she was hitting those signature moves and telling us "dont need no hateration, no holleratin in this dance for me". (Literally had to Google because I just mumble the last part when I sing along). But all jokes aside its easy to get caught up in stress and drama. Whether its from work, family, friends or internal. It can be draining and really bring you down. Music really helps me. I literally have to stop some days and throw on some Solange or Jhene and breathe. Breathing can be therapeutic, why do you think your Apple watch tells you to take a few minutes and breathe throughout the day? Because it works. And it may not be that simple. Some days I need to walk, pray or even shut my phone off for a few. I recently recognized the hidden gems of ignoring the stresses of life and making sure Im happy and healthy. Ive made some changes in the relationships I choose. My friends list may have had some reductions, on Facebook and in real life. And work is work, 9-5 and then Im done. I don't take it home with me. I have developed a method of keeping my feet up and my headphones readily available at my desk. Does wonders for my mood and when I need to tune people out. There are so many things that you can do. Meditation apps, coloring apps and even apps that coach you on breathing. Fitting a way to improve your mental health on a daily basis can really help you focus on whats important, YOU.
5. S O L I T U D E.
It may not work for everybody but it definitely works for me. And sometimes its necessary to get your thoughts and feelings together. I get lost in those moments for hours, sometimes days and weeks if need be. My friends sometimes hit me like "what have you been doing?" or "where have you been?" And I cant come up with an answer. Ive either been under the covers binge watching a tv series or catching a movie or trying a new restaurant by myself. I know people that refuse to eat alone, but I enjoy it. If you never spend time with yourself do you know what you really need? Honestly it may not work for you and I do enjoy my friends and family time, but there is something so magical about "me time". Its like investing in yourself. Getting your nails done, hair cut or done at the salon, and going for a facial; are just some of the ways you can enjoy yourself without a crowd. Doesn't hurt to try it!
Its so easy to be consumed by the things that surround us, but are you taking care of you? These are just some simple things that I do to make sure Im taken care of. There are so many things that you can do and may already do. Dont be afraid to be selfish with your time, fall back and take care of you!
Drop what you do (in the comments) to take care of yourself.
No comments:
Post a Comment